How to Start a Divorce When Husband Had an Affair

Question from Jane, How to Start a Divorce When Husband Had an Affair

Answer from AI:

If you’re considering starting a divorce due to your husband’s affair, especially with children involved, there are several steps and considerations to keep in mind. Below is a general guide to help you understand the process and what you might expect.

Understanding Grounds for Divorce

In the United States, divorce laws vary by state, but most states offer both “no-fault” and “fault” grounds for divorce.

• No-Fault Divorce: You don’t need to prove wrongdoing by either party. Common grounds include “irreconcilable differences” or “irretrievable breakdown of the marriage.”
• Fault Divorce: You must prove that your spouse’s misconduct, such as adultery, caused the marriage to fail. This can sometimes impact alimony and property division.

Given your situation, you might consider filing for a fault-based divorce on the grounds of adultery. However, consult with a legal professional to understand the implications in your state.

Steps to Start the Divorce Process

1. Consult an Attorney: Given the complexities of your situation, especially with children and property involved, it’s crucial to consult with a family law attorney. They can provide personalized advice and help you navigate the legal system.
2. File a Petition for Divorce: This is the formal document that starts the divorce process. It will outline your grounds for divorce and any initial requests for child custody, support, and property division.
3. Serve the Divorce Papers: Your spouse must be formally notified of the divorce proceedings. This is typically done through a process server or law enforcement officer.
4. Temporary Orders: You may need temporary orders for child custody, child support, and spousal support while the divorce is pending. These orders can help ensure financial stability and a stable living situation for your children.
5. Discovery Process: Both parties will exchange information and documents related to assets, debts, income, and expenses. This helps ensure a fair division of property and determination of support obligations.
6. Negotiation and Settlement: Many divorces are settled out of court through negotiation or mediation. This can be a less adversarial and more cost-effective way to resolve issues.
7. Trial: If you cannot reach a settlement, your case will go to trial, where a judge will make decisions on contested issues.
8. Finalizing the Divorce: Once all issues are resolved, a judge will issue a final divorce decree, which legally ends the marriage and outlines the terms of the divorce.

Key Considerations

• Child Custody and Support: Courts prioritize the best interests of the child. Factors include the child’s relationship with each parent, each parent’s ability to provide care, and the child’s needs.
• Property Division: States follow either “community property” or “equitable distribution” rules. Community property states divide marital property 50/50, while equitable distribution states divide property based on fairness.
• Spousal Support (Alimony): Given your role as a stay-at-home mom, you may be entitled to spousal support. Factors include the length of the marriage, your financial needs, and your husband’s ability to pay.

Resources and Legal Help

For more detailed information, you can refer to resources such as:

• U.S. Courts Divorce Resources
• Cornell Law School’s Legal Information Institute on Divorce

When to Seek Legal Advice

Given the complexities of divorce, especially with children and property involved, it’s crucial to seek legal advice. A family law attorney can provide personalized guidance and help protect your rights and interests.

Remember, this information is a general guide and not a substitute for professional legal advice. Always consult with a qualified attorney for advice tailored to your specific situation.